Missing Kendra

My life has been pretty crazy these last few months!  My husband and I took a much planned and anticipated trip to Italy for our 40th anniversary and then upon returning home, we moved across country 10 days later. After all the work and headache of unpacking and finding places to put things, I swear I will never move again!!!

We moved from a place we called home for 40 years and it was bittersweet leaving.  But, we did move to be closer to our two daughters and two of our three grandchildren.  I was very relieved that we had Kendra cremated and we could bring her along with us, as if she had a grave site there, that would have made leaving even harder.

 

While preparing to leave though, I did have lots of moments of sadness when I thought about all the memories we had there. All three of our girls were born in the same hospital there and went to school, church, mission trips, choir, singing, baptism, graduating high school, leaving to go to college and three weddings.  It felt a little like leaving home and being homesick.  But, we are very excited for our new chapter and we love our new home and city and can not wait to make new memories here.

The thing that will never change is missing Kendra. I miss her every moment of every day.  I miss hearing her big laugh when she told an off color joke or teasing her sisters.  I miss hearing her voice on the phone, seeing her name pop up on a text or call.  I miss seeing her, hugging her or watching the excitement on her face, talking about her kids.  I hate that all I have now are the memories, no new ones, no new photos, no coming over for family get togethers or holidays and no new texts, calls or voicemails. I treasure all the memories and photos and stories about Kendra, but, what I wouldn't give for one more hug, one more story, one more memory.

We built a library in our new home in honor of Kendra and since I had all her books, I have put them all in there. And that is where Kendra is, nestled in among her favorite books, her Harry Potters, Little House on the Prairies and a huge assortment of eclectic other favorites, she's right in the middle, right where she should be.  Missing you big K Girl.